Dominican Republic 1999, the latest in the series of endurance safaris from Club Dugdale... trip if you dare

Club Dugdale is proud to present to you the story of his latest epic from small bizarre islands. Cunningly disguised as a holiday, you will be escorted on an apparently harmless virtual trip to the lovely islands of The Dominican Republic.

Here you will pause to bask in the warm evening air as you step from the plane having left the January weather of Britain a mere four hours drinking earlier.

Navigate the stormy seas of depravity, and we all know who's at the helm - Club Dugdale

Lounge by the pool, it's close to the bar - everywhere is close to the bar. You cannot escape, you are a number, you are monkey, you are astroturf. Looks good doesn't it - looks can be deceiving. 151 hell in a glass

Ahhh that's better, a fine sight. The 'Sportset' net (any chance of some sponsorship Nick?) strung lovingly betwixt two posts / palm trees / stout Germans. Prime for some hot monkey action. Life is good, did I mention the 151 ?

... and the monkeys rested. Post vb in the sun, pre dip in the warm seas, during the red beer haze of the mid afternoon. Make a feeble attempt at volleyball for the amusement of the locals

oh oh monkey too hot, sun too hot. Or is Dr Immac shading a 'resting' Dr Phukwit from the folly of his ways. Drink, drink, drink a red beer frenzy - lie in the sun - allow your 'friends' to turn you, thus ensuring an even, all over radiated glow

23 May 2003